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I commuted to a junior college for a few semesters, and was working full-time while attending night classes. At the while I was technically living at home, but I tended to crash on friends' couches because I didn't feel safe driving all the way home after a long day of working. The night classes would frequently let out at 10pm. Then of course there were the group study sessions, cramming nights before exams... My mother had to "deal". I would phone her frequently, let her know that I was safe. That's all she really wanted from me - was to know that I was safe. I tried to be home as often as I could on the weekends, wake up early when I was home, go for runs with the dog, work in the garden - be an active part of the home life. Heck, I would even drive home on my lunch break some days to water the fruit trees during the summer. It was relaxing, and it made my parents feel like I was contributing.
I found it challenging, if not impossible, to meet all of my parents' expectations while I was an adult at home. They wanted me to pay rent, but there was no way that I could afford my car payments, car insurance, courses, and rent... they gave me wiggle-room. They made me feel loved and supported. And they were happy when I transferred up to a wonderful university to finish out my degree - even more excited when they realized that it was all paid for by grants. The fact that I didn't need their assistance financially when I was ready to move on made up for the fact that I couldn't pay rent while I lived with them.
You're going to have to remember that your daughter loves you, and that she wants to be a good person. Sometimes your idea of a good person and hers isn't going to fit the same definition. Be ready for that, and you'll do fine.
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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq
"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy
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