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I wouldn't stop talking to her cold turkey or anything like that.... if you are going to reduce the time you spend with her, let her know ahead of time and let her know what's up and why you are doing it... It's really cruel and not fair to soo without her knowing why... that goes double since it affects her income.
I really don't see anything wrong with what you are doing as long as you can make it so that it doesn't get in the way with you giving your wife / family all of the attention she desires and deserves.
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