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levite · 11-24-2010, 12:58 AM

It is fucking ridiculous.

I went through security at O'Hare recently, and got pulled out for a "random screening pat-down." You would think that the bigass Jewy-looking sonofabitch with Hebrew on his t-shirt and a Star of David earring would not be the guy who apparently rings terrorist bells for TSA employees...but apparently you would be wrong.

Let me just say that I have had dates that didn't get as far with me as that TSA guy got. Nobody has ever touched me in those places without buying me dinner first, or at least a drink.

I actually had to warn the guy, "Hey, those are not explosives, and they are fragile!"

I admit that I find it a little ironic that we teach our kindergarteners and first-graders that if an adult does that to you, it's "bad touch," and you should run and tell your parents or a policeman; but now, apparently, if the TSA does it to you, you got nobody to run and tell about the bad touch, because apparently it's been sanctioned by Congress or Jesus or some fuck....

I am really pretty sure that if we've gotten to the point where we think national security's going to improve by pulling random travelers out of line in the airport and molesting them in public, we are in trouble. And I'm not even saying how much more so that's true when our travel cops are profiling rabbis to yank over and gate-rape them.... Seriously, you woulda thought that bastard was checking my circumcision scar....

Somewhere inside me, I truly believe that if, today, George Washington and Thomas Jefferson were told that national security depended on their willingness to let some jamoke in a polyester uniform tug on their joystick and shoot craps with their nads for dice, they would cordially invite the person who told them so to take a flying fuck at a rolling tankard of nut-brown ale.

/rant

11-24-2010, 12:58 AM	#3 (permalink)
levite Minion of Joss Location: The Windy City	It is fucking ridiculous. I went through security at O'Hare recently, and got pulled out for a "random screening pat-down." You would think that the bigass Jewy-looking sonofabitch with Hebrew on his t-shirt and a Star of David earring would not be the guy who apparently rings terrorist bells for TSA employees...but apparently you would be wrong. Let me just say that I have had dates that didn't get as far with me as that TSA guy got. Nobody has ever touched me in those places without buying me dinner first, or at least a drink. I actually had to warn the guy, "Hey, those are not explosives, and they are fragile!" I admit that I find it a little ironic that we teach our kindergarteners and first-graders that if an adult does that to you, it's "bad touch," and you should run and tell your parents or a policeman; but now, apparently, if the TSA does it to you, you got nobody to run and tell about the bad touch, because apparently it's been sanctioned by Congress or Jesus or some fuck.... I am really pretty sure that if we've gotten to the point where we think national security's going to improve by pulling random travelers out of line in the airport and molesting them in public, we are in trouble. And I'm not even saying how much more so that's true when our travel cops are profiling rabbis to yank over and gate-rape them.... Seriously, you woulda thought that bastard was checking my circumcision scar.... Somewhere inside me, I truly believe that if, today, George Washington and Thomas Jefferson were told that national security depended on their willingness to let some jamoke in a polyester uniform tug on their joystick and shoot craps with their nads for dice, they would cordially invite the person who told them so to take a flying fuck at a rolling tankard of nut-brown ale. /rant __________________ Dull sublunary lovers love, Whose soul is sense, cannot admit Absence, because it doth remove That thing which elemented it. (From "A Valediction: Forbidding Mourning" by John Donne)