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I'm not suggesting that there is some magic fix to make people feel like they belong. Just that people can be responded to more effectively than has been done on this thread. Acknowledgment rather than dismissal and judgment. That is simple, too.
I liked Cyn's idea about the messages, it's an ideal avenue for expressing an understanding that sometimes people struggle with finding a place here at first, that it's normal and doesn't mean that they aren't valued, blah, blah, blah. Keep posting and if you have any questions or comments let us know, yadda, yadda, yadda. I mean, essentially endeavoring to build and retain membership here is similar to building a client base for a business. You don't do that by telling clients that they're wrong, end of story when they call customer service with a problem.
Obviously many, many people find it intimidating to post for whatever reason. They may be insecure or shy. They may not think of themselves as good writers...for what it's worth, you have a number of people who express themselves very effectively, very often and often with a lot of wit. They may see a number of different people posting similar things to what they want to say and don't want to be redundant. They may be concerned about being misunderstood or um, judged, for what they think. The list could go on and on and on. Saying 'I don't understand why they feel that way' or 'they shouldn't feel that way' are neither conclusive statements about those perceptions nor are they conducive to solving the problem addressed in the OP of this thread.
Granted, I am being taught this semester a way to speak to people that is supposed to make them feel validated and at ease and it is definitely bleeding into my posts on this thread. So it may not be relevant at all. I'm sure a few moons ago I would have been right in there with you telling folks they're nuts for feeling that way. But I do believe that it is essentially wrong, both in spirit and as it pertains to the purpose of this thread.
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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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