ZombieSquirrel

I like to watch How I Met Your Mother. The main character drives me a little batty, but NPH is totally worth it.

Anyway, last night’s episode had a plot line centered on one of the main female characters, Robin. Robin is a very headstrong and independent woman and never seemed to make the men in her life feel needed. She could take care of herself and thus did not need to rely on a man. The episode centered on Robin and her feelings toward her female coworker who had a very innocent and childlike personality. The men were drawn to the personality and the lead male character even dated her. Robin was threatened both professionally and personally by how this woman seemed to gain attention by being so needy. I too can be annoyed and even threatened by the little girls of the world who try to use their innocence as an advantage. Also, I have felt like the bad guy for not coddling these girls like everyone else in their lives.

As a young girl I was always brought up to not need a man. My mother felt it was important for me to feel this way and I am thankful. In my youth I never understood why my female friends would swoon over boys. Why would they giggle? Why would they follow them around like puppies? Why would they blindly agree with whatever they said? Most importantly, why do my female friends still do that? This is probably why I don’t tend to have a lot of feminine friends.

I was once told bluntly by a man, “You don’t need me and I need to be needed.” (That was evident by the women he had dated before me.) I actually felt pride in this. It’s true, some men find my self reliance refreshing. I’m low maintenance and can survive on my own. There are also men out there who need caregivers. (As was the case with M, who I dated for nearly 4 years.) I pondered what sort of people were attracted to me and in turn, to what sort of people was I attracted? I don’t tend to need to be in a relationship. Sure, it’s nice and I do enjoy it, but I don’t actively look for a partner. I’ve been in very few substantial relationships, because it’s not a priority for me. It's not me making excuses for the lack of dates. I get asked out, a lot actually. I get hit on. I just don't seem to care. I’m sure some of you will argue that this is a front, but I will be honest and say it’s not. That’s what has worried me before. Why do I not need it? Why am I satisfied with only myself? I enjoy physical love and have enjoyed being in relationships in the past, but am perfectly content without being in a relationship. These are questions that I can only answer myself as there are many layers and subtopics that I am still trying to decipher.

The questions I pose to you are:

If you identify as masculine, do you search for/attracted to a stereotypical feminine personality for which you can be a caregiver? If so, are you intimidated by those who do not need your care?

If you identify as feminine, do you feel as if you need a masculine persona to take care of you? If not, do you feel as if your independence is a detriment to finding a mate? (If that is even what you seek?)


Relationships are weighing on my mind lately, not for the relationships themselves, but the end results. I want offspring, but have questioned if I want a partner.

__________________
Attack ZombieSquirrels