yeah for the first year or so i was running around either losing the hard-on at inconvenient times or blasting off with the slightest stimulation. i will say this - it is all in your mind. clear it - concentrate on the task at hand. don't think about ANYTHING except her.
that usually seemed to work for me, anyway. sometimes i'd just have to go down on her or something b/c it just wasn't going to happen (often that was alcohol-related). this is especially effective if you plan on seeing her again. get her off that way a few times and she'll come back for more even if you end up being a terrible fuck or can't get it to work. (side benefit of this tactic - i love licking pussy anyway so this can get the ol' cock to cooperate)
yep. agree sex does not equal porn. unless you're watching (actual -real ) amateur porn....
oh yeah for the record when i was young and in your shoes, i used to read articles, etc. off this site
http://sexuality.org/ although i did not have the wonderful world of the TFP at my disposal