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Kids are a hell of a lot smarter and aware than most people give them credit for.
You can create a relationship of respect without neccessarily infringing on the parent, but having that behavior stay around permanently and consistency will not happen unless it is enforced ALL the time.
I've used my hearing as example when I get whiny kids throwing a fit - I tell them my hearing aid doesn't work and I can't understand them when they cry and yell and scream. If they need my help, they can get my attention by coming to me, and talking to me. Then we can figure out what to do together.
That is an example of how I don't neccessarily say what the parent is doing is wrong, but that I can encourage them to behave a certain way, with the hope they make the connection they're more likely to have more positive experiences if they do it with everyone.
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Calling from deep in the heart, from where the eyes can't see and the ears can't hear, from where the mountain trails end and only love can go... ~~~ Three Rivers Hare Krishna
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