katyg: I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I don't think anyone here would support the idea of someone getting an abortion when that person doesn't truly want one; we are suggesting that the mother is likely not thinking clearly about the issue and perhaps through discussion soma can make her realize that there are better options. Going through life avoiding expressing your own wants and desires out of fear that someone else will not like their consequences is no way to live. If the mother decides to have an abortion or give the child up for adoption after talking things over with soma, then that's her own responsibility. Just like the fact she is pregnant is soma's responsibility. He shouldn't be required to keep his own desires locked away just because someone else might not like them.
ironman: The fact he's less screwed than her doesn't take away from the fact that he is still screwed. Furthermore, I get the impression that she's perfectly fine with "[putting] her academic, social and work life on a hiatus," which only contributes to making soma even more screwed. Lastly, if she doesn't feel screwed by this - and it seems she doesn't - then it hardly makes sense to say she has it worse off than soma. Neither are in a good position, but soma seems to be the only one with the good sense to realize it. As they say, ignorance is bliss.
As for Nonoxynol-9, it actually increases the risk of HPV and HIV infection because it is a skin irritant. Most safer sex educators I know of specifically recommend against its use.
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"Musicians are the carriers and communicators of spirit in the most immediate sense." - Kurt Elling
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