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The discussion about the differences between reality and fantasy is a difficult one. I think there are some clarifications required. I don't think it's just a matter of "Hey, I know it's just a movie!" I think it's about how the prevalence and volume of porn can formulate ideas of norms, when they aren't even close to being common practices. I don't think many women enjoy being sprayed with sperm. I could be wrong. I also don't think ass-to-mouth is very popular; again, I could be wrong.
Beyond that, in terms of the effect of porn on men, I'm sure there are varying results. I'm sure there are many men who use porn with little or no negative consequences, but I'm willing to believe that most heavy users of porn cannot escape the negative effects. I read recently in a newspaper something I'm willing to buy into: that porn, for many men, represents rejection, frustration, and even shame.
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Knowing that death is certain and that the time of death is uncertain, what's the most important thing?
—Bhikkhuni Pema Chödrön
Humankind cannot bear very much reality.
—From "Burnt Norton," Four Quartets (1936), T. S. Eliot
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