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So... Stereotypical gay men, right? You're saying they're duped into feminization at the hands of a segregational "orientonormative" culture? That's really interesting.
What about the guys I know who didn't come out until many years after their friends put it together, based on their behavior, style, etc? I literally have known men who didn't come to terms with their gayness for DECADES after everyone around them was crystal clear about it. I think (hope!) there's less of that happening now than there was 20 years ago when I was in high school and college, just because the world is so different now. They were ALREADY stereotypical in certain ways, long before they made any sort of choice or followed any sort of social prescription regarding their behavior.
I generally agree that the human tendency toward grouping and labeling is unfortunate. Our language defines. We're mostly unaware of that fact--we think our speaking is about describing objective facts in the world, unaware that in fact we're creating reality (literally) with our speaking.
What do you propose instead? You can't just rail against the notion of "orientation" and leave it at that. How should we view sexuality?
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