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I'm really sorry to hear that. Similiiar thing happened to me. After some ineffective counseling and some snooping I confirmed what I suspected. Even after the pain and betrayal I was willing to take her back. Luckily I did not as I am a better person for it and was acting out of fear and trying to cling to past.
For me a drunken one night stand is much easier to accept than a planned event. Feel free to PM me if you wish. You're about to start a long road, but if you make some good and thoughtful decisions it can be less bumpy.
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