Quote:
Originally Posted by Charlatan
From his opening post, he has already pretty much assumed she is guilty and he just wants to prove it. My ultimate answer is, Why bother? He doesn't trust her. She's guilty in his mind and he's just looking for proof. Why wait? The trust is already gone and he is just looking for something more substantial to throw in her face.
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I think he needs to bother, so that he knows what the real problem is. Is the problem that he unrealistically doesn't trust her, or is the problem that he realistically doesn't trust her. Both are fixable, one way or another. If she's not cheating then he needs to work on his paranoia, otherwise he needs to decide if one of them needs to hit the road.
Confronting her is probably the only way he will figure this out. If he does it right and doesn't alienate her, ( if she's innocent ), then she can help him and they can still have a good relationship. Maybe even a stronger one.
I've mistrusted people in the past only to learn I was wrong. Once I figured out I was wrong, by asking or even snooping, then I was able to work towards a solution in the proper context.
I think the problem with just asking at this point might be that he kind of already has, so he might need to gather more "proof" to revisit the question. I wouldn't sit on it too long, however.
This shit is always confusing, no?