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I don't think your evidence is quite as solid. If you didn’t know your wife had been in threesomes before, would it all seem as clear to you? Why couldn’t she have shaved because she felt like it? Is that really so hard to believe?
What about black lingerie means she's cheating? I wear black most days. Is she always in white lingerie and now suddenly it’s black? That would seem more of a weird thing I suppose.
Soiled panties...err how weird would it be to know your partner had gone through your bag and drawn conclusions from your dirty undies? Yeah, I’d find more evidence first.
She offered you a quickie even though she was tired...well, tired doesn’t mean not horny. I suppose if it’s blatantly obvious that she is doing sexy things but it’s totally not directed at you, then maybe I’d wonder. But you still need to be sure before you confront her and end up making an ass of yourself, and ruining what you have salvaged of your relationship together.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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