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Plan9 · 02-10-2010, 02:12 AM

My problem was that I didn't deal with the bullying, I shut off my life to avoid it like a turtle pulling up into its shell. I was an ugly, goofy kid and bullied constantly until I finished high school. I didn't fit in anywhere (even the freak kids didn't like me) and I was pretty much excluded from any type of social activity related to school from 6th to 12th grade. Needless to say, the military did a good job of inflating my balls. I truly regret not having said balls while I was in high school, though. I could have done great things with those years... track and cross country, debate team, making eye contact with girls, and not letting a bunch of mouth breathers convince me that I was worthless and better off sitting in a darkened bedroom. I used that alone time to develop the wonderful personality you see in my posts. Maybe this is part of the reason I avoid social networking sites like Facebook... seeing how much better off I am now than those that used to torment me is too bittersweet. They don't know how much I let them hurt me and they don't care because they don't even remember... and even though I'm better than them now, I'll never forget any of it. If there's a win, it isn't a clean one. Eh.

It's incredibly difficult being a teenager if you don't have the support network of strong parents, a close family, and friends that'll listen. Turns out we aren't programmed for greatness; we mimic others. I didn't have those things and it really fucked up my life for a while. Your whole world is this shit sandwich and you don't really wanna take a bite. You are your own best friend when you're a "loser" and "outcast" and a general purpose human dumping ground... and thus you're your own worst enemy. You become so fixated on defending yourself that you miss out on life.

02-10-2010, 02:12 AM	#7 (permalink)
Plan9 I Confess a Shiver	My problem was that I didn't deal with the bullying, I shut off my life to avoid it like a turtle pulling up into its shell. I was an ugly, goofy kid and bullied constantly until I finished high school. I didn't fit in anywhere (even the freak kids didn't like me) and I was pretty much excluded from any type of social activity related to school from 6th to 12th grade. Needless to say, the military did a good job of inflating my balls. I truly regret not having said balls while I was in high school, though. I could have done great things with those years... track and cross country, debate team, making eye contact with girls, and not letting a bunch of mouth breathers convince me that I was worthless and better off sitting in a darkened bedroom. I used that alone time to develop the wonderful personality you see in my posts. Maybe this is part of the reason I avoid social networking sites like Facebook... seeing how much better off I am now than those that used to torment me is too bittersweet. They don't know how much I let them hurt me and they don't care because they don't even remember... and even though I'm better than them now, I'll never forget any of it. If there's a win, it isn't a clean one. Eh. It's incredibly difficult being a teenager if you don't have the support network of strong parents, a close family, and friends that'll listen. Turns out we aren't programmed for greatness; we mimic others. I didn't have those things and it really fucked up my life for a while. Your whole world is this shit sandwich and you don't really wanna take a bite. You are your own best friend when you're a "loser" and "outcast" and a general purpose human dumping ground... and thus you're your own worst enemy. You become so fixated on defending yourself that you miss out on life. __________________ *Whatever you can carry.* "You should not drink... and bake." Last edited by Plan9; 02-10-2010 at 02:21 AM..