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I probably have one of the...........wilder......... posts for this particular thread. First of all, let me say that if we were all in the same room, and the vaguely anthropomorphous wildebeest whom I was deflowered by entered the room, I would not alert any of you to that fact. I would, instead, sneak quietly out of the nearest available exit dragging behind me the shattered remains of my pride. She is that appalling.
In my defense, she didn't look quite so offensive when we actually did the damn thing, and further, I have a minor case of UDS (Ugly Duckling Syndrome), one of the more common symptoms of which is inappropriately low standards. I have been treating this with a consistent dosage of Smoking Hot Girlfriend (she's awesome).
Now that we've gotten the levity out of the way, on to the crazy part. This.....girl.....her father ended up many years later shooting and killing my uncle in cold blood in a completely unrelated dispute. What's more fucked up than that is: the evil cocksucker missed. He had actually been aiming for my sixteen year old cousin, whom he orphaned (his mother had been killed in a car accident years prior) right in front of his eyes. The worst part (I know what you're thinking: "There's a worst part?"...yes, indeed there is): you know how in the movies the bad guy sometimes gets off on a "technicality" and you think to yourself, "Stupid cop movie bullshit"........well I'm here to inform you that it is indeed possible, as that is precisely what happened with this cocksucker. They have since moved far far away, and I no longer live in my hometown either, but I often wonder what my reaction will actually be if I'm ever face-to-face with that murdering piece of shit again.
So yeah.....ahem......top that. Lol. Seriously, I'm not looking for any sympathy or trying to kill the mood. Hence the attempts at humor in the opening section. I just couldn't help but share in this particular thread.
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"We each have a star, all we have to do is find it. Once you do, everyone who sees it will be blinded." - Earl Simmons
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