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My advice would be to get off TFP, meet some (new) people, and build relationships with females as friends. You aren't ready for anything further than that. By the way you speak about girls in your life, I feel like you really need to put down the e-dating books you've been reading and actually talk to some.
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"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand)
"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)
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