Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly
If you're making requests, you're not having sex in the midst of a hot and heavy romantic whirlwind. Needing to ask for anything sexually is a sign that you are out-of-sync. Your relationship's level of non-verbal communication is not where it should be. To me, it doesn't sound like things will change because there is likely a deeper set of issues with your relationship. Her lack of enthusiasm for certain sexual acts is merely a symptom of a deeper concern. Watching you in plasure should provide at least some level of enjoyment for a healthy couple. You are placing stress on her by asking her to do something that might well repulse her. If she doesn't have fun with the activities you mention, stop requesting her to perform them. Let her know that you're going to stop asking, and tell her you're sorry for asking her to do these things.
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I like you a lot as a person, but I need to say this bluntly because I disagree so strongly with you.
Telling someone that they should not communicate their desires (sexual or not) and in fact should apologize for asking and having them is really irresponsible advice.
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"The question isn't who is going to let me, it's who is going to stop me." (Ayn Rand)
"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." (M. Scott Peck)
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