|
Well shut my mouth and tie me to a fuckin' possum. I ain't had me such a hoot and holler since my sister Lulubell wrecked her hairdo in the ceiling fan at Stubbys Honkey Tonk. Y'all'arn't fixin to tell me how I should ought to work my fuckin' jaw, there, are y'all? Cause I ain't had such a rip-roaring time since the last time the old lady and me got nekkind and clambered ourselves up in the satellite dish with a pat o' lard and a powerful appetite for some good ol' southern-fride backdoor fuckin'.
Harrumph. Fuck. Being as I originate in the civilized portion of this fair nation, I can only keep that up for so long before I am compelled to shop for deck shoes at LL Bean. I'm hoping you and your wife, sister, aunt, and daughter are both in the finest of fucking fettle.
/ Ahh, Chumley, I understand that the Martinis at Brown Thompson are to die for. Shall we adjourn thither forthwith? Fuckin' A.
__________________
Light a man a fire, and he will be warm while it burns.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
|