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Well, without getting a proper diagnosis, it's really hard to say where to begin. I think poppinjay is on the right track with the wheat allergy. Try switching to a different dog food and see if that helps at all.
You can also give dogs Benadryl. Make sure it has no dye and no added pain relievers in it. 1mg per 1lb of body weight is sufficient. It will make her drowsy, but it will help the itching for the time being. Most dogs chew their paws because there is something bothering their body (fleas, parasites, injuries or allergies etc) or because they are anxious and don't know how to handle their energy.
As far as her reactions to children, it's a tough call. What type of training has she had? Most behavioral problems are solved relatively quickly by socialization training as well as obedience training. I have 2 GSD's and while if they feel a threat they will meet it head on, they are very social and very loveable to anyone that is allowed in my house. I have a 4yr old and a 2yr old. The only reason I mention it is because labs are not power breeds and the training should be easier than say a GSD or Rottie.
You may have to do some sensitivity (weird huh?) training as well. Desensitize her to different things that seem to be bothering her. What is your routine when you leave the house and come back? Does she show signs of anxiety when you leave or return? Those are key things to know in order to try and help put together a plan of training to reverse certain behaviors.
What type of exercise does she get? How many hours? Is it slow paced or fast paced? Labs are high energy dogs and require at least 2 hours of exercise a day. Sometimes if they aren't getting the energy released, they resort to abnormal behavior because they simply don't know what outlet to put the energy in.
Honestly it sounds like a two fold problem to me.. the main being training and exercise and the secondary being the allergies or parasitic problem of the body.
Can you answer a few of my questions in detail so me and others can help you out a bit more? Dogs don't normally change breed specific behaviors unless something is really out of whack.
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