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Old 09-27-2009, 11:09 PM   #25 (permalink)
Daniel_
Evil Priest: The Devil Made Me Do It!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Halanna View Post
First, the OP should not be worring about it to begin with, it's more of an action situation, delete, block, move on and stop obsessing. I'm sorry but I'm not a proponent of "lets talk about every single burp and fart and analyze it to death. From the evidence presented in this thread, the girl is the chaser, the guy is the chasee and he has done nothing wrong. (not to say that he hasn't but from the evidence he hasn't so far). Second, being passive aggressive is not two "dirty words" and has gotten a bad reputation. There is nothing wrong with using it in a situation that is appropriate. An individual should utilize every tool at their disposal, not just those deemed "worthy". Given the right set of circumstances, being passive aggressive will yield you the best results.



Hmm. Sorry, but I don't see. How is the assumption that "They matter and she does nothing: Result = bad" made? They matter to who? Party A, Party B, Party C, Unknown Party D (the jealous current husband of nipple licking gal sending pics off her account without her knowledge trying to start shit ) all of them, 1 or 2 of them? There are too many unknowns for the assumption to made that a certain action will definitely result in a certain outcome.




I don't see HOW asking is even an issue. This is not an issue. Why make it one? Save the obsessing crap and being overbearing for those actions that warrant it. I haven't read anything in this thread that warrants sleepless nights, being physically ill or confrontation.
When I say "they matter", I mean "that the pictures are in some way related to a significant cheating event (mental or physical)". When I say "bad", I mean that by not bringing it out into the open whatever problem exists remains unresolved, festers, and leads to relationship damage or breakup. Also, the OP not knowing may well cause her to be upset or paranoid. Trust me, I went without asking for years in my first marriage, because I was convinced that asking would offend - if I had asked, it would have brought problems to light sooner.

If she closes and locks the door (i.e. deletes the pictures and blocks the email) she's still not going to KNOW. And if there's a more significant issue, I bet he's got her cell number, or can PM her through a website, or has a work email address.

If I failed to answer a direct message from a friend, I would get a text, a PM here, a DM on twitter, an email at work, or something else - all blocking her would do is warn the guy to be more careful because he's busted.

Honest communication is better than skulduggery. If she's worried about his having photos, then she should ask him.

As for the people that ask how does she know they were emailed and when, I can't be certain, but if you are on a PC and use desktop search, plus Outlook as a mail client, the search term "JPG" will call up all the pictures on your hard disk, even if they are email attachments - and if they ARE it will show the date and time of the email.

This will look into all profiles on the machine, if the search settings are wide enough.
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