Quote:
Originally Posted by Bear Cub
Can I set my beer on your head?
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I don't care as long as you buy me two.
Quote:
Originally Posted by noodle
I looked in your pants. It was not pwwwweeeeshhhhuss.
Try again?
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Oh it was, look again. This time with less clothes on. Bring some ale too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by cdwonderful
so the old saw about feet being relative to that "certain part of a males anatomy" rings true in the hobbit world?
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Let's just say all the saucy tavern wenches really know where the long in "Longbottom" really comes from.
*****
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baraka_Guru
Will you tell me a story?
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Once, there was a very peculiar Took who lived in the cold north of the shire way past the remote town of Long Cleeve. He was a strange fellow, always dolting on those books he had bought from those strange Men who traded in furs and amber. He never cared much for other folk, even his own clan shunned him. You could see him out in the woods, reading his books, trying to get the last light of every fading sun. By low candle light he read late into the night, not caring of crops or the harvest. He would walk the woods during the day, his long Took nose stuck deep into the pages of the book he carried with him that day, not caring where he walked only that the light of the sun shown upon the book he read. One faithful day, late of the year 2747, he walked father that he had ever before. Straight past the borders of the northern most points of the Shire, he walked. He walked for hours upon hours until he could walk no more. The light of the sun had past the mountains and shown no more upon this lonely hobbit. When the last rays no longer touched his book, he cast his gaze upon the light shinning before him. Thinking it was a campfire he strode towards it with utmost confidence in his travels. Never once did he look around at the steely gazes that fell upon him, never once thinking to look past his own nose. Sitting down at the campfire, he cracked open his book once more, basking in the light and heat from the roaring flame. He read until he reached the last page of his book and slowly shut the cover. He looked up finally at the figures amassed around him and realized that he had walked right into a campfire of an advancing Orc horde. His screams never left his mouth before the evil Orc before him swung his axe and ended the life of the wayward hobbit. This young hobbit had found the army of Golfimbul who advanced upon the shire with his war-band of orcs. From this story, us hobbits get the phrase "A took with a book is hardly worth a look".