thirdsun

Perhaps she is thinking that you are the selfish one, hence, her remark about what she gets out of it.

But seriously, if you can't come to mutually-acceptable terms with her on this issue, and it's something you really want, you are better off to move on and find someone who can do this without equivocation or hesitation. Those women are out there!!

For some reason, this particular woman is hesitant to do what obviously is important and pleasureable for you. And that is significant. If it isn't important to her to please you in the way you enjoy being pleased or otherwise arrive at some mutually-agreeable solution, then you do need to move on.

But you also need to ask yourself (and her) if you are somehow turning her off in the process of giving you oral sex. Some women don't like to have their head held or forced down with your hand; others have had a bad experience with a previous partner (or perhaps a perpetrator); others have a strong gag-reflex; some don't want to swallow your semen; etc., etc.. You need her to open up and tell you exactly the reason and you need to be sensitive and listen to her.

If she can't or she won't, and you can't give up the idea or the practice, then you know the decision you have to make.