Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post

warrrreagl · 09-07-2009, 05:36 PM

This is not about swine flu, but in a way, it is.

Grancey got stuck in a women's room this afternoon.

We were on the interstate and heading to a Labor Day arts and crafts show, and as we crossed into Georgia, Grancey told me to pull into the official rest stop at the state line. It was the last true restroom before we got into the Georgia back-country and had to face the horror of the arts and crafts show port-a-potty.

Grancey grabbed a napkin from the car to use as a germ-barrier between her hand and the restroom door, and I watched her push open the door to the women's room and go inside. I went inside the men's room, took care of business, and went back out in the lobby, but I was not surprised to notice that Grancey hadn't come out yet. Happens all the time that way - I finish first.

I waited and waited. I started browsing the travel brochures. A family of strangers began to get magically interested in whatever display I was looking at. I would move to another display to get away from them, and suddenly they'd be right behind me again.

I chatted with the ladies at the reception desk. I signed the guest book (with my own pen, not the community pen on the desk). I finally gave up and went back into the lobby.

FINALLY, the door to the women's room opened up, and a big fat soccer mom barrelled out with Grancey right on her heels. She bounded up to me.

She said, "I got stuck in there and I couldn't get out."

"What?"

She explained that she saved the napkin she'd used to push the door in order to have something to turn the faucets. She wasn't about to touch ANYTHING that might have been touched by another human's potentially deadly hands. After washing her hands (and using the napkin to turn off the faucets), she tossed the napkin and had to drip dry her hands since there were no paper towels - only the hot air wall-mounted dryer.

That's when she noticed that the door had to be PULLED in order to get out of the restroom - and she'd tossed her napkin. She was stuck. So, she waited. And waited.

She waited for another woman to come in, use the restroom, and leave so that she could jump out the door right behind her before it closed again without having to touch the handle. And while waiting, she continued to wash her hands over and over and over in order to give her something to do so she wouldn't look like a creepo hanging out in the women's room.

You just know you're going to have a kick-ass afternoon when it starts with your wife getting stuck in a women's room. The moral? According to Grancey - take more than one napkin to the restroom next time.

09-07-2009, 05:36 PM	#161 (permalink)
warrrreagl pinche vato Location: backwater, Third World, land of cotton	This is not about swine flu, but in a way, it is. Grancey got stuck in a women's room this afternoon. We were on the interstate and heading to a Labor Day arts and crafts show, and as we crossed into Georgia, Grancey told me to pull into the official rest stop at the state line. It was the last true restroom before we got into the Georgia back-country and had to face the horror of the arts and crafts show port-a-potty. Grancey grabbed a napkin from the car to use as a germ-barrier between her hand and the restroom door, and I watched her push open the door to the women's room and go inside. I went inside the men's room, took care of business, and went back out in the lobby, but I was not surprised to notice that Grancey hadn't come out yet. Happens all the time that way - I finish first. I waited and waited. I started browsing the travel brochures. A family of strangers began to get magically interested in whatever display I was looking at. I would move to another display to get away from them, and suddenly they'd be right behind me again. I chatted with the ladies at the reception desk. I signed the guest book (with my own pen, not the community pen on the desk). I finally gave up and went back into the lobby. FINALLY, the door to the women's room opened up, and a big fat soccer mom barrelled out with Grancey right on her heels. She bounded up to me. She said, "I got stuck in there and I couldn't get out." "What?" She explained that she saved the napkin she'd used to push the door in order to have something to turn the faucets. She wasn't about to touch ANYTHING that might have been touched by another human's potentially deadly hands. After washing her hands (and using the napkin to turn off the faucets), she tossed the napkin and had to drip dry her hands since there were no paper towels - only the hot air wall-mounted dryer. That's when she noticed that the door had to be PULLED in order to get out of the restroom - and she'd tossed her napkin. She was stuck. So, she waited. And waited. She waited for another woman to come in, use the restroom, and leave so that she could jump out the door right behind her before it closed again without having to touch the handle. And while waiting, she continued to wash her hands over and over and over in order to give her something to do so she wouldn't look like a creepo hanging out in the women's room. You just know you're going to have a kick-ass afternoon when it starts with your wife getting stuck in a women's room. The moral? According to Grancey - take more than one napkin to the restroom next time. __________________ Living is easy with eyes closed.