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LAW2 · 09-06-2009, 07:36 PM

Lots of details that I won’t go into, I’m too tired to type it all out. I have maintained hope through all of this. Hope that we would both work on it and rebuild our marriage. I still love her.

I was snooping through her emails in early August and found reservations for her and another person to go out of town to see a show and stay several nights in a swanky loft with just one bed in late October.

I hoped that maybe she was thinking that we would be better by then and it would be some kind of get away. Well I kept the secret for a little while and then asked her if she would be comfortable going away with me. She said no. So, that means her trip is not for us. Who could it be? Maybe one of her girl friends, and she still has time to cancel the trip, right?

Well Sunday 8/30 I find a birthday card that she had written to her “best friend”. This friend happens to be a guy and someone I no longer trusted and told her that she was having an emotional affair with. She never could bring herself to break off the relationship and in the card she says how much she loves him and can’t wait to go to the show with him. Well that seals it. The trip isn’t for me but for her and some other guy. I confront her with everything I know and she confesses that she started having feelings for him back in April. So all through our counseling she was holding back and basically leading me on. For months I tried my best to make amends and show her how much she meant to me.

Now she’s moving out, which she was going to do anyways, and I was for it thinking that I would give her some space and she’ll come back to me. In reality though he is going to live there with her. How shitty is that?

Basically every paranoid thing that I accused her of was true. The sad part is I thought I could still forgive her and love her for the rest of my life. That was until tonight. She went into the office to work after hours and do some paper work. I went up there to see if she was alone and seeing no other car I began to leave. On a whim I peered into the windows and saw him and her in there together. They were working innocently at first, but then he begins to give her a back rub. When she gets up to fetch some papers off the printer she rubs his shoulders and leans over and gives him a kiss. A kiss that as her husband I could see there were feelings there.
I later follow them to were his car is parked and see them embrace and kiss some more. Then she comes home and pretends like work was so hard with no mention of her company.

It hurts so badly. I love her and hate her all at the same time. Now I have to be uber cool about it because we have kids together (3&5) and we’ll see each other almost every day.

If it wasn't for the lunesta I took I would drive the 2-hours to my parents house to sleep.

Signed betrayed, mad, sad, hopless and unloved.

09-06-2009, 07:36 PM	#23 (permalink)
LAW2 Upright Location: Florida	Unhappy update Lots of details that I won’t go into, I’m too tired to type it all out. I have maintained hope through all of this. Hope that we would both work on it and rebuild our marriage. I still love her. I was snooping through her emails in early August and found reservations for her and another person to go out of town to see a show and stay several nights in a swanky loft with just one bed in late October. I hoped that maybe she was thinking that we would be better by then and it would be some kind of get away. Well I kept the secret for a little while and then asked her if she would be comfortable going away with me. She said no. So, that means her trip is not for us. Who could it be? Maybe one of her girl friends, and she still has time to cancel the trip, right? Well Sunday 8/30 I find a birthday card that she had written to her “best friend”. This friend happens to be a guy and someone I no longer trusted and told her that she was having an emotional affair with. She never could bring herself to break off the relationship and in the card she says how much she loves him and can’t wait to go to the show with him. Well that seals it. The trip isn’t for me but for her and some other guy. I confront her with everything I know and she confesses that she started having feelings for him back in April. So all through our counseling she was holding back and basically leading me on. For months I tried my best to make amends and show her how much she meant to me. Now she’s moving out, which she was going to do anyways, and I was for it thinking that I would give her some space and she’ll come back to me. In reality though he is going to live there with her. How shitty is that? Basically every paranoid thing that I accused her of was true. The sad part is I thought I could still forgive her and love her for the rest of my life. That was until tonight. She went into the office to work after hours and do some paper work. I went up there to see if she was alone and seeing no other car I began to leave. On a whim I peered into the windows and saw him and her in there together. They were working innocently at first, but then he begins to give her a back rub. When she gets up to fetch some papers off the printer she rubs his shoulders and leans over and gives him a kiss. A kiss that as her husband I could see there were feelings there. I later follow them to were his car is parked and see them embrace and kiss some more. Then she comes home and pretends like work was so hard with no mention of her company. It hurts so badly. I love her and hate her all at the same time. Now I have to be uber cool about it because we have kids together (3&5) and we’ll see each other almost every day. If it wasn't for the lunesta I took I would drive the 2-hours to my parents house to sleep. Signed betrayed, mad, sad, hopless and unloved.