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Old 08-18-2009, 02:44 AM   #48 (permalink)
Suzz04
Crazy
 
Location: Virginia
Quote:
Originally Posted by wooÐs View Post
A lot of people say this. But I don't understand why. I'd honestly be flattered lol. It did happen once before and I thought it was adorable. I had nothing to hide of course. If I did, then I would definitely be furious.

As we all know, you take a chance on getting hurt when entering any sort of relationship. When tension's in the air with a significant other, a simple 'are you cheating on me' question will not always get an honest answer lol. Especially nowadays.

Not that I'm any different than anyone but I have been hurt very badly by men as well as women in my past. I choose to avoid having my heart ripped out again if at all possible - all while knowing that if I do start looking for trouble, there's a damn good chance I will indeed find it. I think it's a control thing. I must have the upper hand even when getting fucked over, if that makes sense.

My motto - expect the worst and hope for the best.
right on the words with the question of are you cheating on me will get a honest answer. the relationship was going really well and suddenly it took a deep turn into silence and constant ignoring, chat messages closed when i walked in the room. so i asked that of him, got a no and he was enraged. i told that i was being possessive, etc.

it wasn't til then i went to snooping. yes, i felt dirty about it, but the hostility i got made it too hard to not look. however, i found the correct answer. he was and had plans of moving away from the area without saying another word with a old ex of his. confrontation with print outs of said emails and chat messages, the plan went out the window. i had hoped for the best, but expected the worst and found it.

the second time, again same one, i don't know why i bothered staying with him. he got to acting all suspicious again. we went from having a really good relationship again and then went into the same routine. i never asked this time. he had decided to hook up again with a different ex who was in a relationship herself, and she was too afraid to leave him and he was giving her time to before telling me he was gone.

so, sometimes, it pays to. and yes, we had each other's passwords to everything. i didn't do anything, i had nothing to hide. thus the openness of said information. why he didn't change the passwords after the first time i don't know, but i caught him in the act once again.

plus at the time this was going down prior to the breakup, we had mutually agreed to move to a place closer to his grandmother to help her more. i had already signed the lease and came back to a WTF did you sign it. i was completely confused and said you already put your signature on the papers before i even did mine.

so, my snooping came about to too much suspicion of actions and attitude. am i proud of myself? no. i sometimes wish i never did it. but the other times, i'm glad because i would have come home and he'd have packed up and left without me having a clue.
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