Quote:
Originally Posted by aceventura3
Yes. Adults have a major influence on the behavior of children. If we act like we don't care you get one result. If you act like you care you get another. I think we should act like we care.
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Adults influence their children, yes. But unless you want them to turn into adults who are unprepared for the world, the muzzle has to loosen up sometime. Do you really think parents should have cameras or spies watching their child's every move in order to show they care?
Having been both a parent and a child, here's my take.
My parents loved me. This I knew. I was raised in a very disciplined environment, but acted out and did things no child should be doing at a very young age. I was pregnant twice in my teen years. My parents were upper-middle class and my father wore a suit. Love simply wasn't enough. There are so many factors involved, i.e. I was a teenager who felt misunderstood and alienated much like most other teenagers. All the teens I've talked to over the years, through today, indicate very similar patterns. When we become promiscuous and sexually active at such a young age, it was because we wanted to feel loved and special and we craved positive attention. Although I don't have any meaningless stats to report, I can confidently say this sentiment is not uncommon amongst teen girls.
As a parent myself, I love my children. I consider myself somewhat of a disciplinarian, but I give my girls (youngest now 15-1/2) freedoms as they earn more and more of my trust. I think I just lucked out with my oldest, who's 26), but none of them are or have been pregnant and I have confidence that my teens will not have sex until they're in college. Is it because I love them? I don't think so. It's because I've been extremely open with them and taught them to love themselves first so that they don't seek affirmations (can't think of the effing word!) from guys. Of course there's more to it, but I believe that's a key part of their education that's missing.
While I realize this may not be an easy task for many parents, allowing the schools to teach your kids about self-esteem and other related issues would be equally important. Maybe the parents could attend an orientation so they could reinforce at home what's taught at school.
I agree with ratbastid that sex ed should be handled at school. Most schools have PE or study hall or something that can be sacrificed for an hour or two a week.
I have neglected teen boys from my soapbox, but I'm sure someone has a better experience to offer as far as what they need to know about how to treat girls/women and respect themselves. Sex ed ain't only about using condoms and removing cum stains.