Quote:
Originally Posted by LoganSnake
if he can't find the strength to actually try and save his marriage, then leaving her is what he should do regardless of what he said at the altar. Why have both of them suffer because of the promise you made when you got married?
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I see what your saying and understand your ideology, you are probably being more rational than I am about this. But, I just can't get past this whole idea that we can just pick out a new one when the old one doesn't work as good as it once did. THAT'S CALLED DATING NOT MARRIAGE!
The truth of the matter is this man is not going to find what he is looking for somewhere else. I have had amazing lovers who would have made AWFUL husbands and terrible lovers whom I could have spent my whole life with.....the issue is not about what he is missing in his relationship but what he is missing within himself. This cycle will continue for him and any relationship he is in if he doesn't figure out what he needs and is craving out of life.
You notice he mentioned nothing about serious and life altering issues, just the fact that he wants to try out a skinny girl or even any girl other than his wife.....he isn't complaining that his wife is not meeting his emotional, economical, or supportive needs. He is complaining that she's fat and he wants to sleep around. So what happens when he meets the skinny chick who's a bad lay and even worse human being? What do we say then? Keep trying until you find the right one? It seems to me he is bored and has probably reached the comfort stage of his marriage (over 7 years) and just doesn't know how to move forward from here.
---------- Post added at 08:44 PM ---------- Previous post was at 08:35 PM ----------
Quote:
Originally Posted by Punk.of.Ages
Kudos for being ever wise in all of your immense self-righteousness, but not all of us were blessed with such insight from birth. Some of us had to gain it through experience and mistakes.
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I have lived and learned just like you...self-righteous?!?! Yeah, it's obvious you know nothing about me...nor was I implying that my way is the only way...just because I take marriage seriously and people's self-worth and commitments to one another equally as serious does not make me self-righteous...it means I stand for something. Sorry for you...
No I don't think someone should stay and be miserable or make someone else miserable just because they made a mistake when they weren't wise enough to know better BUT I also don't think it should just be an easy: "Well you settled and you were young and now that you know better lets just destroy other lives so you can get what you were always looking for." What's wrong with saying: " You should try to work it out with your wife first?" What's wrong with asking him to put some effort into the woman he committed his life too? If he tries and fails and he tries and fails or if she just doesn't meet him half way, well then sure you need to move forward you did all you could to fix the marriage....but until your exhausted from trying....YOU DIDN'T TRY HARD ENOUGH!