Sounds like you found at least part of the problem but this:
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But now that you guys mention it, there is another symptom: when you give the gas, sometimes there's a lag before the transmission engages.
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Worries me. That's exactly the type of behavior you'd expect to see with a torque converter failing. Be wary, and know that your mileage is probably borrowed. At some point you'll be accelerating hard and it'll just pop and go into neutral, and never go back.