UnclearContent

Thank you all for the replies.

Shell, I did mean that my girlfriend and I both know about the drug slash prostitution. My grammar suffers when I'm falling asleep or waking, and both of my posts were basically written while half-conscious. My girlfriend doesn't engage in either the drugs or prostitution, both for moral and health reasons.

Since my financial situation is an issue I'll explain in more detail.

When I started college my father agreed to pay for it all. I had wanted to take a year or two off after graduating from high school to save up money but my father refused to pay anything if I did (yes, flat out refused to pay anything if I took so much as one semester off before starting college. He also told me he would have my health insurance cancelled if I took any time off). So I joined. After seven months my father was laid off of work and decided to take a few years away from corporate work due to burn-out. At this point I have zero income and a lot of bills to pay. So what did I do? Took out student loans. I went to school for another year on fiancial aid and student loans. At the end I realized that this had the potential to become a burden for both me and my mother. After some debate (and a lot of encouragement from my father) I joined the military.

I enrolled in split-option for the Army Reserves. I completed my basic training and was sent home. Within a month of returning I fell off my buddy's front porch and mangled my ankle. Two bone bruises and five sprains, all confirmed by MRI. Because of this I could not run or really exercise for about nine months. While I recovered I gained most of the weight I had lost in basic and by the time I was cleared to run I could not meet standard to go to AIT (second half of my military schooling).

I dropped out of school and worked overtime to cover my expenses. Over the next few months I saved up enough to go back to school for the spring. I joined the ROTC program and lost all of the weight and passed my PT exam. I turned this exam in to my sergeant and asked him to queue me for AIT. Instead, he lost my paperwork and never told me. I spent two months waiting for my orders to come in. At the end of the two months I received a notice for uncharacterized discharge due to PT failure.

I'm out of financial aid, and to keep the student loans from becoming due I have to stay in school. So I take out more loans. I get two full-time jobs and try to take classes that only require I attend the exams so I can just study at home. I work over 100 hours a week between two warehouses. About a month in I tear the medial miniscus in my right knee and am on crutches. I lose one job and the other job reduces my hours. A week later I am hit on the interstate by a kid who said his brakes just randomly locked up and lost control. Most of my injuries are in my lower back. Now I can't work and go on disability.

I'm barely supporting myself as my girlfriend hasn't been working during this time and I was the sole source of income. She finds a few part-time jobs and stays in school, but it's rough. About six months later I am having terrible vertigo, chronic sinus infections and am losing the sight in one eye. A CAT scan reveals a mass of nearly one inch in my brain. An angiogram shows it to be a brain aneurysm. I have the surgery to repair this. My monthly medical expenses are pretty high at this point.

I fully accept responsibility for my situation. A lot of bad choices and a run of bad luck. I love my girlfriend and I do not ask her for help with this. When we got together we had planned for me to work while she goes to school as she has a better shot at success than I do. Now I'm in a situation where I can barely pay for my own food and she's having to cover her education entirely on her own. She can't get financial aid because her parents make too much money. Her parents don't help her.

I want her to go to school. I want her to be successful. I want to get out of this mess. THAT'S why I don't want to tell her to quit a job that has this kind of money-making potential. She can't work two jobs or her immune system crashes. One job and school is still enough to send her over the edge most times.

This is why I'm stuck.

I just want to figure out if it's possible to accept this. If I can change my view-point. If not...I really don't know what I can do.

---------- Post added at 10:34 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:22 PM ----------

Xerxys -

I do have some emotional baggage, I believe. I'm not sure yet how to deal with it.

Manic_Skafe -

I have some issues coping with stress. Have since I was a kid. And, yes, shitting blood is unacceptable. I want to get this whole situation under control as quickly as possible.


Crompsin -

Hysterical.

And, no, I'm not really okay with it the situation.


Shell -

You may be right about the disrespectful oogling. I don't like the idea of anyone looking down on her.


Guccilvr -

I know she's not fucking these guys. I'm not really sure why I'm so bothered by this. I can't pinpoint anything.


SecretMethod -

EXACTLY!!! And thank you for the benefit of the doubt.


To all -

My girlfriend understands my feelings. My inablity to understand what exactly is bothering me is why she recommended I come to this forum. She's had a lot of success getting good advice from you all and thought you may be able to help me sort a few of these things out. I appreciate all of your time with this.