Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - An interesting problem regarding oral sex

najo · 07-21-2009, 11:40 PM

1) Sex is important. You both fullfilling each other's sexual needs is critical to a healthy relationship.

2) Communication is important. You two need to speak openly, respectfully and honestly with each other.

3) Women and men can change their sex habits. They just need to agree to try things at the edge of their comfortablity without going over it and know they are safe. You can't violate the trust between you when doing this and agree on what the two of you arwe going to do before doing it. Otherwise, the sexual boundries are more open then you realize. You both are assuming to much.

With all of that, here is what I would do if I were you:

1) Give her oral pleasure first, completely unselfishly. Please her, pay attention to her responses, make sure to start easy and becareful of how sensative her clitorus, vulva and labia are. Use lots of foreplay and leave your cock out of it until you have sent her up the walls. Make her cum as much as she can. Then after wards, ask for her to do the same to you.

2) Do mutual masturbation. Get a blanket (or not) sit on the couch watch a movie, and start playing with each other's lower bits under the blanket. Purposfully do not have sex, get each other off without intercourse.

3) Use a vibrator on her.

4) Mix the sex up. Do different positions, do mix ups of oral and intercourse. Go down on her before and after you've been in her but before cumming. Allow sex to blur the lines between your bodies and the pleasure you give and recieve.

5) As said above, do 69.

6) Watch Porn together. Have her tell you what is arousing to her. Let her lead. Allow her to get turned on by the girls and guys in the porn. You don't focus on the girls directly to avoid upsetting her at first, just the acts the men and women are doing together. Then when she likes something they are doing, you and her do it. Basically, let her see how good sex can really be. Amature porn from the internet is likely better for this cause.

7) Share your sexual fantasies. Tell her you want to hear about her dirty secrets and what really turns her on. Let her talk about anything and don't get jealous. Make it safe to encourage her sexuality to come out. Tell her how sexy she is and how much her getting naughty with you turns you on and makes you want her more.

Basically, instead of over talking it. Find ways to take your actions into steps towards your goals. When the time is right, have open communication about it. help her find the value through actions in what sex can be. You allow your sexual boundries and skill in pleasuring her to grow too. The problems in the bedroom are two sided.

Good luck.

---------- Post added at 02:40 AM ---------- Previous post was at 02:37 AM ----------

Oh, one more thing. Tell her you won't cum in her mouth until she is ready for you too. If she doesn't want you to, ask if she is willing to work towards it. If she is then do it in steps, like her licking cum off your cock or you cumming on her and her wipping it off and licking it. If she doesn't want you to cum in her mouth, then respect that and put the cum where you and her agree it should go. At least you will be getting the majority of a blowjob.

07-21-2009, 11:40 PM	#43 (permalink)
najo Upright	1) Sex is important. You both fullfilling each other's sexual needs is critical to a healthy relationship. 2) Communication is important. You two need to speak openly, respectfully and honestly with each other. 3) Women and men can change their sex habits. They just need to agree to try things at the edge of their comfortablity without going over it and know they are safe. You can't violate the trust between you when doing this and agree on what the two of you arwe going to do before doing it. Otherwise, the sexual boundries are more open then you realize. You both are assuming to much. With all of that, here is what I would do if I were you: 1) Give her oral pleasure first, completely unselfishly. Please her, pay attention to her responses, make sure to start easy and becareful of how sensative her clitorus, vulva and labia are. Use lots of foreplay and leave your cock out of it until you have sent her up the walls. Make her cum as much as she can. Then after wards, ask for her to do the same to you. 2) Do mutual masturbation. Get a blanket (or not) sit on the couch watch a movie, and start playing with each other's lower bits under the blanket. Purposfully do not have sex, get each other off without intercourse. 3) Use a vibrator on her. 4) Mix the sex up. Do different positions, do mix ups of oral and intercourse. Go down on her before and after you've been in her but before cumming. Allow sex to blur the lines between your bodies and the pleasure you give and recieve. 5) As said above, do 69. 6) Watch Porn together. Have her tell you what is arousing to her. Let her lead. Allow her to get turned on by the girls and guys in the porn. You don't focus on the girls directly to avoid upsetting her at first, just the acts the men and women are doing together. Then when she likes something they are doing, you and her do it. Basically, let her see how good sex can really be. Amature porn from the internet is likely better for this cause. 7) Share your sexual fantasies. Tell her you want to hear about her dirty secrets and what really turns her on. Let her talk about anything and don't get jealous. Make it safe to encourage her sexuality to come out. Tell her how sexy she is and how much her getting naughty with you turns you on and makes you want her more. Basically, instead of over talking it. Find ways to take your actions into steps towards your goals. When the time is right, have open communication about it. help her find the value through actions in what sex can be. You allow your sexual boundries and skill in pleasuring her to grow too. The problems in the bedroom are two sided. Good luck. ---------- Post added at 02:40 AM ---------- Previous post was at 02:37 AM ---------- Oh, one more thing. Tell her you won't cum in her mouth until she is ready for you too. If she doesn't want you to, ask if she is willing to work towards it. If she is then do it in steps, like her licking cum off your cock or you cumming on her and her wipping it off and licking it. If she doesn't want you to cum in her mouth, then respect that and put the cum where you and her agree it should go. At least you will be getting the majority of a blowjob.