Backwoods Sex
A week after their marriage, the backwoods newlyweds, Ed and Arlene, paid a visit to their doctor.
"You ain't gonna believe this, Doc," said the husband. "My thingy's turnin' blue."
"That's pretty unusual," said the doctor. "Let me examine you."
The doctor takes a look. Sure enough, the redneck's "thingy" really was blue.
The doctor turns to the wife, "Are you using the diaphragm that I prescribed for you?"
"Yep, shore am," she replied brightly.
"And what kind of jelly are you using with it?"
"Grape," she said.
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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.
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