I find time processing to be very interesting. This isn't just a cultural issue, but a biological one as well. Culturally, I think everyone knows that some cultures are more time-focused than others. Shani wants guests to arrive to an 8:00 party at 8, whereas when I was going to my Italian professor's house for a dinner with classmates, she expected us to be at least half an hour late. How the Germans and Italians managed to ally in WWII I'll never know! Beyond culture, individuals process time differently as well. There are past-focused individuals, present-focused individuals, and future-focused individuals. Combine that with other factors, like attention deficit disorder, which is also linked to chronic tardiness, and it all paints a picture that punctuality is far more complex than we give it credit for.
Personally, I come from an Italian heritage with an ADD brain... I'm rarely on time. I make sure to make up for it by almost always staying late at work and making it clear that my tardiness does not reflect my level of respect for the job or coworkers. It's just part of my brain chemistry, so I try not to beat myself up over it and instead focus on doing what it takes to adjust to it in a time-focused world.
The thing is, it's common for very punctual people to view another person's lateness as disrespectful towards them. It's not. At least, not for most people. I'm actually a little surprised this is still an issue, as we learn more and more about how fundamentally different people can be. My friends know I'm likely to be late, and it's accepted as an aspect of my personality just as I accept unique aspects of their own.
What's truly amazing is that people manage to get along so well when there are so many dichotomous variations in personal predispositions. Some people are more likely to be spiritual (whether that manifest itself in organized religion or something else), while others are more inclined to doubt. Some people have more prefrontal white matter and are more likely to be imaginative and/or tell white lies, while others prefer a "just the facts, ma'am" approach. And, some people are finely attuned to the passing of time while others aren't.
I try to remember that others have a greater time focus than I do, and do what I can to accommodate them when we make plans.
I also don't blame them for thinking differently from me when they arrive at 8 and I really meant 8:15
---------- Post added at 03:53 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:49 PM ----------
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShaniFaye
this is exactly why I am the way I am...I think as a child I never got anywhere when I was supposed to be there lol. For me though, Im always 15 minutes early.
Hell I dont have to be at work til 630 but Im there at 6 am every day
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This is also a factor. I focused on the nature side in my post, because that's what I'm most familiar with, but there is indeed a nurture element as well. And then the world gets really crazy when you realize the nature sometimes causes the nurture, and the nurture sometimes causes the nature.... humans are complicated!