Quote:
Originally Posted by begavet
Recently about 2 weeks ago me and my ex started to keep in touch again by emails, you know the usual how are you?what are you doing this weekend? thing. We have been talking about maybe meeting up and catching up a few months from now since she lives 2 states away from me.
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Does your girlfriend know you are communicating with your Ex by email? Does your Ex know you have a life and a child with your Current? I would think with emails you have been catching up enough.
Quote:
Originally Posted by begavet
I really would like to go and visit her and catch up, just for the simple fact that in this life its important to have friends because you never know when you will need them. plus on top of that she is doing the same career that im going to start soon and maybe in the future she can reference me for a job.
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Again, I think you have done enough "catching up" through email. You have forfeited putting yourself and your friends first when you had a child. Now that child must be at the forefront of your mind.
Quote:
Originally Posted by begavet
Can anybody suggest a way that I could go and see her, and not hurt my girlfriend?
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There is no way. This is not a gray area. You will be showing your Current that your friendship with Ex is more important than her or your child. I can't really put it delicately, you can't have your Ex and your girlfriend too (think have your cake and eat it too).
Quote:
Originally Posted by begavet
Im not trying to sound like a dick but since my girlfriend isn't a big fan of her, the last thing i want to do is tell her im going to see her cause ill be afraid that everything will go downhill and my girlfriend and me have a good relationship.
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Your fears are well grounded. You are feeling irrational about your friendship with your Ex and not giving your Current the respect, not including YOUR child, they deserve.
You can not split yourself in two and run down both sides of the street. Choose a side, and stay there. Beware if you choose the wrong side, there will be heartbreaking consequences . For one, two or all three? Your Ex won't get hurt, but what you are doing can blow up your life, your Current's life and your child's life.