iwst99

Hah, sorry if I did sound like a bot, I'm not. I'm not trying to sell anything either, just providing a service.

I'm posting another review in this post, it's for one of the most popular products on the market, and I can honestly say, DO NOT BUY IT. It's a waste of money and it's gotten nothing but negative complaints. The product is called ExtenZe. It available is many stores and online and they advertise everywhere.

As I type this we are currently on a product called "Cockstar." We tried it last night and it's meant to last about two days, so we're giving it the benefit of the doubt for the whole two days. After work today we're going out and buying more products, as it seems that people really enjoy these reviews and their helpful to some. Someone also asked about a gum male enhancement product called "Sexlets" (Like Chiclets) so we're in the processing of ordering that as well to try it out.

There really isn't a female analog to this, as it's two guys doing the testing (with each other) as I explained in the first post. I would be the female in this situation I guess. So far Tango has been the best product we've tested. Your man will stay rock hard with a little stimulation, and he'll feel sensual as well. I know because I felt it as well. I was surprised that it was even working the next day.

Stiff Nights gets you hard for sure, but there doesn't seem to be any sensual stimulation! He said, and I quote "my dick is so hard, I want to stick it in something really bad, but I just don't feel anything." I felt the same way, I was hard but I just wasn't feeling stimulated, even if I had my nipples rubbed and everything (which is my most erogenous zone). From what we were told from another product manufacturer it's because of the ingredients in Stiff Nights. They're not meant to get you stimulated, simply to rush your blood to your penis.

We've done Viagra as well, but we won't be reviewing that. We're doing only natural products that are available over the counter and that claim to work within at least an hour within taking them.

Below is the review for ExtenZe. Feedback for reviews or recommendations are welcome!


First of all I don’t really know how I feel about purchasing sexual enhancement products at a convenience store. Nothing fills a young mother with consternation at a 7-11 more than some freaky middle-aged dude perusing hard-on products while she’s trying to buy drum-sized Horchatas for her also-present niñas. I’m sure she might have considered grasping her rape whistle, but alas, she left it at home, presumably strewn about among other drum-sized beverage containers in her too-small-for-three apartment.

My personal shopper at this purchase was the jauntily named Asian shop keep Chuie. Upon requesting to be directed to a product that would “get me up”, he swiftly recommended those little “5 Hour Energy” bottles. Whereupon I discreetly said, “no something to really get me up”, whereupon his non-name-tagged co-worker suggested the new improved “14 Hour Energy” bottle. I do appreciate the salesmanship here, but I have to digress into wondering what kind of activity would require 14 consecutive hours of crystal-meth like intense energy. LeMans Driving? Open Heart Surgery? Working at this Farshlugganah 7-11? What? Presuming the language differences between “get me up” and “keep me up” were insurmountable (even after I said “no, get me up, like for sex”) I did find a small collection of odd shaped bottles that discreetly provided the promises of length, strength and girth! O Valencia! They came in the form of these tidy little Cherry Extenze Shooter bottles. Priced at the bargain-minded counter price point of $2.99 (about the equivalent of the latest issue of Jet Magazine or three forlorn looking cream cheese and jalapeño taquitos), I couldn’t resist trying out this name brand product (hey, I saw it on TV – it must be good) in the comfort of my own home.

I grabbed the cute little bottles and headed off to the Internets to be provided with a plethora of well-lit You-Tube segments gushing and fawning over the ExtenZe line of penis-centric formulations. Wow! The holy grail of sexual potency at my finger tips for the price of deep fried cream cheese! Some woman (huh?) named Bridgitta was particularly agog over the cherry beverage and I couldn’t help but wonder what sexual limb had she extended? Ah well, the product has sold millions and the production values were awesome and the owner of the company was so reassuring that iwst99 and I immediately toasted our good fortune and slugged down our little growth-bevvies, which I have to say tasted de-lish. Either like liquefied Chapstick or finely chopped Crayolas.

Suffice to say, the product said we’d be “feeling it” in 20 minutes or so. Perhaps these are the same people who say “your call is very important to us and we’ll be with you shortly” because it has now been 18 hours and I still don’t feel a fracking thing, except perhaps six bucks poorer. There is a theory in the natural products biz that says if you run your infomercial enough and sell enough of something – consumers believe it must work. While a subsequent review will get around to the flagship product of these shylocks, these Extenze Cherry Boosters are a pathetic attempt at cashing in on the notoriety gained from running late night infomercials featuring jiggly-breasted women hyperventilating over penis size. No cock-swings for you, you shameless FTC violators who put “Size”, “Pleasure” and “Performance” on the side of a bottle and then leave you flaccidly twisting in the wind. A call to your customer service number is in order. Wonder how long I’ll be on hold….



-Postal

---------- Post added at 03:44 PM ---------- Previous post was at 03:43 PM ----------

Well, we do have some toys but I'm not sure if we're going to review those. We'll start off small for now I think. There are hundreds of these products to review so we'll keep ourselves busy!