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Old 05-12-2009, 08:39 AM   #89 (permalink)
Plan9
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Willravel View Post
Go to an NRA meeting.
You mean: "WillJethro, you took my last Skoal tin! Damnit, I've had it!" *dumps AK47 mag into your chest at less than a meter*

Ugh, yeah... I've been to numerous NRA training courses for my certifications and I'm always the undercover liberal. It's scary.

They're overweight middle-aged white guys... and I think they have prepped lynch ropes waiting for their ideological enemies.

...

Hmm, lemme examine the thread title again:

"American conservatives are preparing for an armed revolution."

American conservatives = right wing nutjobs who haven't flexed anything except their blogs and credit cards in the last zillion years

Preparing = essentially doing what they've always done, stockpiling ordnance for the comin' of the Great White Jesus

Armed = not exactly surprising given the hobbies of said nutjobs; hobby militants need magical talisman security blankets too.

Revolution = initial conflict (pure coincidence / almost accident) spawned from some paranoid redneck killing a curious state trooper / game warden / racial minority followed by a seemingly endless "Live on CNN!" standoff back at The Compound where AKs are white-knuckled, eyes are slitty, and pork-'n-beans are consumed en masse. Predictably problematic force-on-force resolution involves nearly-botched neutralization-super-suppression by trigger-happy ninja-lookin' M4-wielding stormtroopers of The Man due to the typical quantity (small numbers) and quality (abysmal organization) of the Wolverines! Maybe, if we're really lucky, some of the bumbling junior agents will kill the group leader in a spray-'n-pray 2nd floor shootout finale deluxe, we'll get a new infamous date outta the incident (10-10-10'd!), and some disenfranchised and overly sympathetic former army Sapper Leader Course dipshit will blow up another federal building (killing a bunch of innocent children) with a rental truck full of ANFO all in the name of Stickin' It to the Man That Keeps Us Down.

Yay!
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Last edited by Plan9; 05-12-2009 at 09:08 AM..
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