All the ladies who have responded have been wonderfully honest & that helps us all. For me, we don't have kids because we both never felt mature & unselfish enough to have them. On that we agreed. And yet when I went through the "wanting kids in the 30s" he wasn't on board because I had changed. At that time I realized that it was something that doesn't always come to both mates at the same time so I'd be patient. Long story short, no kids, but great professions and lots of travel and amazing adventures. I made that choice and have decided it was the best chocie for me personally.
As for keeping the marriage alive & happy, that does take some work & a ton of patience. We do best when we have outside interests, hobbies and so forth. Our separate vacations - about once a year has been a good tonic too. All marriages are different (true!) and have their special bonds and connections. You need to see which bonds are the ones worth nurturing and help that happen. It will always be true that
mom does it all, all the holiday planning, school support, all the things that so many guys just leave to the Moms! But dads do their thing too in their own way. It's not a competition. And some weeks seem so terribly lopsided. But I bet you have a good thing because you have a real family. Take time to appreciate the real small unique things that belong to you 3 or 4? And let us know how it is going..... go get a pedicure and get a sitter for a whole afternoon. or let him do the dad thing - with no rules at all.
It'll improve, I'm certain.
Best regards....hunnychile
