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Old 02-07-2009, 07:52 PM   #1 (permalink)
Plan9
I Confess a Shiver
 
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Important first meeting? "No problem," says monster zit.

This is going to be a pretty tasteless thread. Most likely total college toilet humor.

...

Thread introduction:

So I was just thinking about how awesome my body is... and it turns out that it hates me, too.

I mean, seriously... got an important first meeting like a date or a job interview? A zit big enough to crack open a beer bottle on appears on my chin within 3 hours of the start time. Without fail. Regardless of hygiene or any other factor. I don't even have to be stressed out or change my diet or dunk my head in a vat of Vaseline. No, Monster Zit (TM) will show up right on my chin, nose, or upper lip like a pore-clogging suicide bomber. Jihad on my face!

And is there ever great time for a sudden case of explosive diarrhea? No, but your body will save it up for the first trip home to meet her parents. Oh, yeah.

...

Thread question(s):

Okay, TFP... what awesome bodily malfunctions do you experience during important life events? Any good stories about ejecting butterflies made of vodka onto someone's shoes? How about destroying an interview with pit stains the size of Utah? Let us know how your body failed you.

I gotta know.
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Last edited by Plan9; 02-07-2009 at 07:57 PM..
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