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Things I wish I hadn't learned the hard way
* Air bags don't feel like pillows. They feel more like a giant brick in the face.
* After handling hot peppers, wash your hands before having sex.
* Just because a man says "I love you" doesn't mean that he really does.
* Remember the frozen pole on "A Christmas Story?" Popcicles frozen on dry ice stick to your tongue the same way.
* A "slip and slide" without the water is more like a "stick and burn."
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"Ok, no more truth-or-dare until somebody returns my underwear" ~ George Lopez
I bake cookies just so I can lick the bowl. ~ ItWasMe
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