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Old 01-23-2009, 11:32 AM   #1 (permalink)
braisler
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Location: Midway, KY
Going down... who's got the harder task?

So, I've been thinking on this for a bit. While we can all agree that the 'job' of going down, performing oral, giving head, is usually one performed with pleasure and eagerness to please, we might also agree that there are times when our tongues have gotten a bit tired, our jaws sore, our lips numb, etc. So the question at hand: which gender is the more difficult to give oral sex? For the purposes of this question, let's assume we are talking about the full act. Is it harder to bring a man or a woman to orgasm via oral sex?

For clarity, it would be helpful to give your gender at the beginning of the post and, if you are comfortable, your sexual orientation/experience. One could argue that the only people who are really qualified to answer this question are experienced bisexuals of either gender. But I'd be interested in hearing from everyone who has something to say on the subject.

My thoughts on the topic. I'm male and have only had experience with oral on women. I think that it is more challenging to bring a woman to orgasm by oral sex for several reasons.
  1. Emotional Content - Women typically have to be in the right mood/emotional state to really be ready to receive pleasure and possibly to climax. You can't just start in on a woman the way that you might with a man. Further, during the act, if she gets distracted by her own thoughts (non-sexual thoughts creeping in) or other distractions. For men, or at least for me, you couldn't distract me with a hand grenade while I'm getting head.
  2. Physical Issues - Female genitals are more difficult to navigate than male genitals. Put simply, a dick is a dick is a dick. Lick, insert, suck, repeat. With a woman, each is built a little bit differently with different sensitivities and the erogenous zones vary from woman to woman and differ with arousal level and can even be different for the same woman at different times of the month, etc. Also, there is seldom a 'sure-fire' method that will please a woman every time. It is necessary to be keyed into her responses as you go and alter your touch, pressure, and intensity of contact, not just with her clit, but also inner and outer labia (touching and kissing), penetration during oral and more. Admittedly, this is some of what makes oral sex fun. But if and when it isn't going well, it can become frustrating for both of you.
  3. Working your mouth - I may not have the experience to comment much here. Maybe it is fairly difficult to open your mouth wide enough to accommodate a girthy penis without scraping it with your teeth. And there may be other challenges to giving head to a guy that I just haven't thought of. But I can say that it is pretty challenging to stick your tongue out of your mouth and wiggle it around while varying the speed and pressure you are applying for 10-30 minutes. Women, if you don't believe me, try it out for yourselves. Stick out your tongue and then move it from one corner of your mouth to the other for just 5 minutes. :P Not so easy is it?

I hope that the content of this post doesn't come across as misogynistic or like I am negative on oral sex. Neither of those is the case here. Far from it. I love women and I love oral sex, both giving and getting. I'm just curious as to the experiences of my fellow TFPers. So let's have it!
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