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Old 12-29-2008, 05:31 AM   #1 (permalink)
cajeff
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Sex life has gone with the wind...

Well, I've been a reader but none poster on this forum for awhile but now I need help so here I am.

Statistics...
Me 23, Her 23
7 years together

Our first few years together we would have sex several times a day and in every place imaginable, ie bjs in cars, theatres, parks, etc... As time moved on it became 5-7 times a week with a day in between every now and then, perfectly fine. Lately, it has become 2-3 times a week at best and nothing during that time of the month, a bj or handjob if I'm lucky.

As a young guy I have a high sex drive and find that it seriously affects my sleep, mood and daily life if I do not have something (sex, bj, handjob, etc..) once a day, or at least more often than now. I have talked to my girlfriend about this and she just says I am a nymph, I say I am a young male and its natural.

I recieved an email with a link to a sex drive article from her with a personal message attached saying 'This is a really long article, but I'd like you to unerstand the part about showing affection without the pressure of having sex. And how that is a type of fore play that women need for good sexual desire. It also explains that to men sex is their way of showing affection and connecting, which is what you've been saying. But I need you to meet me in the middle and realize that putting pressure on me makes me draw away from you and not want to touch or cuddle with you. I know that it's not just sex to you, but it becomes just sex to me without that "innocent" touching.
I love you honey. I want to fix this between us.'

Now here is where the problem comes in...She has mentioned all of this before, so I have tried many times. Not mentioning sex or sexual acts for weeks at a time. The result is that we have sex a 2-3 times a week, and after a few weeks of this I really need more and mention that fact and the arguing starts all over again. Sex is not only a way for me to feel connected to her but I cannot sleep without it. Masturbating doesn't do much, as it's the connection I really want.

What I'm I to do when she says not to mention it and I will get more, so I don't mention it and recieve the same amount (2-3 times a week). I should mention that it is not like I am not satisfying her, she typically has 2-4 orgasms each time we have sex. When I have to wait I do not feel connected to her because it is more the satisfying of the buildup at that point and I end up cumming quicker because it has been a few days.

Sorry for writing a novel...Opinions please?
cajeff is offline  
 

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