Thank you all very much for your replies! I read them on Saturday afternoon, and the majority of you seem to think that discussing it with her was the right thing to do, so I was convinced enough to tell her. But that's not how it turned out:
Strip Club Stuff:
I texted her, saying that I needed to ask her something. Then she said, "well I need to ask you something first since it's probably more creepy, lol." She asked for my address, which I don't find creepy at all, and she said to expect a surprise; she seemed sooo happy about it too... Then she asked me what my question was, and like, I couldn't do it, I couldn't ask her her opinion on me going to a strip club! I just said like, "do you really want to meet me next month?". I was just trying to say anything that seemed like a viable question to follow up on me telling her I needed to ask her something, to which she replied, "YES!!!
!" anyways. I went from being positive I wanted to discuss it with her, to not really knowing if I should anymore. We kept talking about other things, funny things, happy things, and I just didn't feel like it was the right moment to discuss it with her.
So anyways, yeah, I ended up going to the Strip Club. I wanted to go, and we've planned this adventure even before I met her, I couldn't back out now. I thought of it as either way I'd regret it in one form or another; If I went and her and I really do get together, I'd have to hide it, or eventually tell her. If I didn't go and her and I never get together, I'd regret not having gone there.
My biggest regret is not having any "bad" regrets. Normal people do stuff that they think isn't wrong, then end up regretting it later. I want to be normal. She's has her regrets too, a one-night stand with a guy, and staying with one of her boyfriends that just used her. It's all in the past now though. So yeah, I wanted a regret, but the only difference is that it's not in my past before I met her, it's while I've known her and liked her. Not sure if that changes everything I've just said above...
The Strip Club was
amazing though. Was an all nude one. This may sound weird, but it was one of the best days of my life, mostly because of the 3 lap dances. I felt like a real guy, like, this may be what it's like to have a naked female body on you... I mean, it's the first time I seen boobs in person, let alone vaginas and everything. I didn't think feeling breasts would ever be anything special, it's just skin and fat and stuff, but the feel of them totally blew me away and was unexpected, the softness of em and all. The first lap dance I had was from a lady with fake breasts, which I didn't know at the time, but they felt like, hard, and wasn't impressed, but the 2 other women's breasts were so soft and felt great. I must sound perverted saying this...
So anyhow, I don't know if I did the right thing by not telling her... I wanted to, but everything was totally out of sync. Ugh...
Being Me Stuff:
I don't know what it is about me... I don't have one single friend in this town, and I just haven't met any people yet. With that said, when I was with my friends the other day, out of town, I feel confident. Like, we went to Chili's and the waitress was a very cute, pretty girl, and I joked with her and it felt normal and enjoyable; I did it because like, if she didn't laugh, my friends would laugh, or they'd laugh at the fact she didn't laugh, and that makes me laugh. So either way, I impress the lady or my friends with my humor. But when I'm by myself, all alone (which is 99% of the time), I don't get that same feeling of confidence.
Well anyways, thanks again for everyone's advice and for the confidence about the potential of an online relationship, but I feel bad that I let some of you guys down by not being able to go through with it, but I'm let down most of all for not doing it. I really wanted to, because I was convinced it was the best thing to do. I hope things work out...