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You're probably going to end up buying both eventually (given what you've said about yourself and your gaming habits), so don't look at it as an either/or proposition, look at it as which one you're going to buy first.
I know you've mentioned that you want to pick a console your fiancee can enjoy as well; if she's not really into gaming, that console would be the Wii. If she is into gaming, and has played games like Grand Theft Auto and Soul Calibur before, you'd want to choose the PS3 first.
We have both (I own the Wii, my SO's brother owns the PS3) and the Wii is generally more popular at parties. The only game that really went over well in a party situation on the PS3 is Soul Calibur IV. We get asked to bring our Wii with us to other houses; even my parents requested that I bring it for Thanksgiving. I like having both--I get to play the PS3-exclusive titles and I have a fun console to share with friends.
Oh! The other thing to keep in mind is what kind of TV you have. If you have an non-HD TV, the PS3 will look like crap, but the Wii will still look good. You need an HDTV to really appreciate the PS3, and to read all the text in-game. We ran into that problem on the PS3 with GTA4; you couldn't read the text messages at all on our non-HDTV.
Hope that helps.
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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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