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Sinter24 · 10-26-2008, 11:06 AM

Hi fellow TFPers, I could really use some relationship advice. Wasn't sure if this should be in sexuality or life forums.

I guess I'll start with about me.. I'm 20 years old, I've only ever had 1 girlfriend in my life so far which is why I'm asking for some assistance. I am a fairly shy person and pretty confident. I was very antisocial from when I was about 13-18, had no friends dropped out of school and no interaction with people, I was basically addicted to computer games and that was all I did when I was a teenager. After I had my first job I quickly adapted I didn't like who I was and how antisocial I had become, I wanted to change I did a lot of self-help reading and it helped immensely.

These days I am doing pretty good, I am not antisocial to talk to people.. I don't get shy or nervous at all. I still have no friends outside of work besides my girlfriend, we'll call her Amy. But I'm working on it. I hope that helps you all understand more about me and my situation.

Amy.. my amazing girlfriend. I met Amy about two months ago. I worked with her brother at my very first job about 2 1/2 years ago and we have been keeping in touch off and on. Really good guy, anyway about 2 months ago he invited me out to coffee so I went. I met a bunch of his friends and his sister, Amy was also there. I didn't think any thing of it at the time I just hung out with her brother and his friends, she was pretty nervous around me, but we made eye contact and smiled a few times. We eventually left and went to play pool, Amy stayed behind with a couple of her friends.

The next day Amy txts me out of the blue (she got my number from her brother) says hi we txt back and forth like crazy.. and she asks if I'd like to hang with her sometime, I of course say yes and we go out for coffee, we were both extremely nervous but it went well, we also went to play pool after coffee. All that was good, flirted, talked a lot... she wants to date me but she's scared because she had a bad breakup with her ex boyfriend, they were together for a year and the guy just dumped her out of the blue, she was crushed. So she was really scared to be in another relationship because she didn't want to get hurt, or hurt me.

We talked a lot about well everything imaginable, views on relations, sex, life etc. It took a while but we eventually started dating. This girl really means a lot to me, she is a really amazing friend and person. She's beautiful in every way imaginable. She is also way more experienced, she's not a virgin, she's done everything sexual. I have done nothing, complete virgin. She knows all this and is completely fine with it.

The Problem:

She wants me to make all the moves and initiate everything. The most I have ever done with Amy is make out about 3 times...when she was intoxicated (she initiated everything) I was drinking too but not drunk. But it was amazing it was very romantic and exciting for me, and for her. I want to say too that all these times making out with her intoxicated I didn't think she was as intoxicated as she was. I have no drinking experience, never been drunk yet and I only started drinking after I met her, so I have no idea how it affects a person from first hand experience. But that was fine, she had no problem with that, she said I was a really good kisser. true or not I don't really know. So that's as far as we've gone together, making out.

The farthest we've gone sober is kiss.. she kissed me. We do hug a lot, and we hold hands, there is a lot of physical contact which I really love and I'm not nervous at all. But I am really nervous making the move to kiss her I mean I really want to, I know she wants me to but I honestly don't know what to do or how I would go about initiating it. I've been wanting to kiss her so bad. She says she is fine with all this she's very patient and understanding with me.. she knows I'm nervous. I've had so many opportune times to kiss her too when we've been alone.. I have all the right feelings for this girl, we both want a long term relationship. I'm not in this relationship for sex, I do really like this girl though and I want to slowly progress... I just don't know how relationship progress works, how to initiate, how to make the moves, how to be more romantic could really use some help here I'm so inexperienced...

Sorry this was so long I really really appreciate any help, insight, tips anyone can give me. Thank you so much!

10-26-2008, 11:06 AM	#1 (permalink)
Sinter24 Upright	Relationship advice.. long.. Hi fellow TFPers, I could really use some relationship advice. Wasn't sure if this should be in sexuality or life forums. I guess I'll start with about me.. I'm 20 years old, I've only ever had 1 girlfriend in my life so far which is why I'm asking for some assistance. I am a fairly shy person and pretty confident. I was very antisocial from when I was about 13-18, had no friends dropped out of school and no interaction with people, I was basically addicted to computer games and that was all I did when I was a teenager. After I had my first job I quickly adapted I didn't like who I was and how antisocial I had become, I wanted to change I did a lot of self-help reading and it helped immensely. These days I am doing pretty good, I am not antisocial to talk to people.. I don't get shy or nervous at all. I still have no friends outside of work besides my girlfriend, we'll call her Amy. But I'm working on it. I hope that helps you all understand more about me and my situation. Amy.. my amazing girlfriend. I met Amy about two months ago. I worked with her brother at my very first job about 2 1/2 years ago and we have been keeping in touch off and on. Really good guy, anyway about 2 months ago he invited me out to coffee so I went. I met a bunch of his friends and his sister, Amy was also there. I didn't think any thing of it at the time I just hung out with her brother and his friends, she was pretty nervous around me, but we made eye contact and smiled a few times. We eventually left and went to play pool, Amy stayed behind with a couple of her friends. The next day Amy txts me out of the blue (she got my number from her brother) says hi we txt back and forth like crazy.. and she asks if I'd like to hang with her sometime, I of course say yes and we go out for coffee, we were both extremely nervous but it went well, we also went to play pool after coffee. All that was good, flirted, talked a lot... she wants to date me but she's scared because she had a bad breakup with her ex boyfriend, they were together for a year and the guy just dumped her out of the blue, she was crushed. So she was really scared to be in another relationship because she didn't want to get hurt, or hurt me. We talked a lot about well everything imaginable, views on relations, sex, life etc. It took a while but we eventually started dating. This girl really means a lot to me, she is a really amazing friend and person. She's beautiful in every way imaginable. She is also way more experienced, she's not a virgin, she's done everything sexual. I have done nothing, complete virgin. She knows all this and is completely fine with it. The Problem: She wants me to make all the moves and initiate everything. The most I have ever done with Amy is make out about 3 times...when she was intoxicated (she initiated everything) I was drinking too but not drunk. But it was amazing it was very romantic and exciting for me, and for her. I want to say too that all these times making out with her intoxicated I didn't think she was as intoxicated as she was. I have no drinking experience, never been drunk yet and I only started drinking after I met her, so I have no idea how it affects a person from first hand experience. But that was fine, she had no problem with that, she said I was a really good kisser. true or not I don't really know. So that's as far as we've gone together, making out. The farthest we've gone sober is kiss.. she kissed me. We do hug a lot, and we hold hands, there is a lot of physical contact which I really love and I'm not nervous at all. But I am really nervous making the move to kiss her I mean I really want to, I know she wants me to but I honestly don't know what to do or how I would go about initiating it. I've been wanting to kiss her so bad. She says she is fine with all this she's very patient and understanding with me.. she knows I'm nervous. I've had so many opportune times to kiss her too when we've been alone.. I have all the right feelings for this girl, we both want a long term relationship. I'm not in this relationship for sex, I do really like this girl though and I want to slowly progress... I just don't know how relationship progress works, how to initiate, how to make the moves, how to be more romantic could really use some help here I'm so inexperienced... Sorry this was so long I really really appreciate any help, insight, tips anyone can give me. Thank you so much!