laudanum

I've been dealing with the same issue for years and it seems to be getting better.
Here is what has been helping me.

The first thing you should do stop masturbating. Or rather stop using what sex columnist Dan Savage calls the "Vulcan Death Grip" when you masturbate. It decreases your sensitivity and makes it harder to come. Try to hold off as long as you can until you can be with actual woman. When you do masturbate use a Fleshlight . Don't get the tightest one. Try to set it up so that you don't user your hands. I personally use it by sticking it between my mattress and box spring.

The point is to disassociate your orgasm with what you were doing for the last however many years you've been doing it. I personally had spent most of my life jerking off in bed on my back using my hand. As soon as I started having sex, I would lose my erection.

Using a Fleshlight in the way I described, puts me on my knees and a close normal sexual thrusting position. It also gets your hands disassociated with your orgasm.

As for condoms, I personally like the Crown's Skinless Skin Condoms. Ultrathin and very strong as well as transmit heat very very well. Luckily I live in a city where there are a lot of sex shops that have it available. After you get used to a "look ma no hands" orgasm with your fleshlight, you can try it out with the condom.


But most of all....From the movie Bull Duram: STOP THINKING! It can only hurt the team.

Again, I can only speak from my experience, but I'm sure others will agree, that when you do anything and are not thinking things work the best. Its like driving manual transmission. If I think about shifting smoothly I fuck up. If I don't think about shifting at all, my driving is smooth. But don't even think "wow that feels good" Moan, hum, grunt anything but words. I think that once you get that part of your brain engaged you start wandering off like JD in Scrubs and stop living in the moment.

Hope this helps

Laudanum