Quote:
Originally Posted by Manic_Skafe
She may have been confused or dissatisfied with your relationship but that shouldn't excuse the fact that she has lied to you, has gone on a date behind your back, ignores you at her convenience and has kissed someone else.
I've been in her shoes before. So unsure of what I wanted, I strung someone along for months as she was absolutely convinced that there was still room to work on "us". Even while I was dating someone else.
I know you don't want to hear it but she's leaving. More than likely, she's already gone.
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Yeah, I do think she already left the old relationship. I do think that I can start anew, though, like it should have been the first time through. I want to work on it with her because I think she's worth it.
The "cheating" issue is always overblown by the mainstream type of advice, and besides, I saw it coming. Additionally, the guy leaves today so it was a built-in commitment free fling. I do not hold it against her, considering the circumstances. Maybe she could've broke it to be me in a better way, but that's all that I'm upset about.
She isn't unsure of what she wants. She's the only who always brought up wanting to do things together after she graduated. She. Always she. She is not a whimsical girl like most of them; if anything, she could do with a bit more of it. She wants more. She told me, "I want more for my time." This is the root of it all, laid bare. I stopped being a boyfriend and became like a brother or some strange thing. She has had trouble with this in her mind for some months now, I believe, and it came to a head last week.
I'm not even sure she's convinced she can work on "us", but I have to at least try. It might be too little, too late, but what else can I do at this point? I have to give it a shot for my own sake.
-----Added 29/9/2008 at 12 : 57 : 07-----
Quote:
Originally Posted by MSD
Break up, spend a while apart (at least 6 months) with no contact and then try to go back to being friends after you've both moved on and met other people. You're not going to salvage this one and she doesn't want to.
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me: "Do you think it's too late for you to want to be with me?"
her: "I don't not want to"
that's her way (since you don't know her you wouldn't know this) of saying, no, absolutely not.
-----Added 29/9/2008 at 01 : 00 : 05-----
Quote:
Originally Posted by onesnowyowl
Yep.
You both are young. She wants to go out and explore life--that's why she did this thing with the German guy. It has NOTHING to do with the fact that he's German, and everything to do with the fact that the opportunity presented itself for her to try something new and exciting.
Call it quits and move on. There's nothing to work on here. If she really cared about you, and was really willing to work things out, she wouldn't have kissed that guy in the first place.
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I believe that I have to try. I do not believe that she has given up completely.
While I agree that it had a lot to do with the fact that she didn't want to regret not doing it, it also is because she has a strange crush on German people. He's not even that great, according to her, she's just confused. It's pretty obvious why.
She convinced herself that I was no longer on board with her as a boyfriend, but rather, I was just using her. Fair assessment, and a harsh truth to have to come to on one's own.
I want to prove to her that I can still be "that guy", the guy that she planned on doing things with after graduating
Even if it ends up being just pissing in the wind, I will at least be able to say that I tried. I would regret it forever if I just gave up here.