Jinn

As much as I disagree with you, I must thank you for having the courage to disagree with the status quo and challenge pornography on a board mostly dominated by men, and one which has its own sections devoted to such. I don't think you're going to get many people who respond with you in agreement, so thanks for standing up for it, if it's what you really believe. You had to know that you were going to get nothing but disagreement, and I don't think I'd personally have the gusto to present an opinion that I knew would only be received negatively.

I myself find it inseparable from my personal definition of what it means to be a man, and I cannot see myself disavowing it without a great deal of cognitive dissonance and (physical) pain. I consider myself a very logical, methodical person who has no difficulty expressing the reasons for my actions. But I have to say that pornography appeals to me on a lower level, one that I don't think I could effectively convey. It's one of those things that requires the "you'd have to be in a man's head to really understand" arguments, as much as that appears to be a cop-out. In the same light, there are things about female behavior which I cannot understand even with logical explanation, as it requires a certain though process only invoked by being inside the world and the mind of a female.

As to the OP, I don't find it adulterous, simply because I subscribe to the "fantasy vs. reality" distinction, regardless of how antiquated the author might believe it to be. I know that if my girlfriend did something physical with another human being, it would hurt me. If she did something with an imaginary being, it would not. I would expect the same logic in reversed roles, and I think that most men believe the same. Women *tend* towards insecurity much more than men, in no small part due to the woman's-body-sexualized society that we live in. It's only natural that in a population group more likely to be insecure that pornography-related insecurity would abound.

EDIT:

I had to add this, to clarify that I wasn't denigrating women for their tendency toward insecurity. I believe it's only a natural result of the society in which we live, the role models we have and the roles we perceive from others. Because so much VALUE is placed on female sexuality, appearance, weight and attractiveness, girls as young as six pick up on this. I believe we're all innately aware of our Darwinian "reproductive value", and we know that by improving on the things that society places value on, we'll be more successful. As such, women spend a great deal of time and money preserving their appearance and their perceived "innocence." It's only natural that someone who (through socialization) places much of their value as a PERSON on their value as a sex object would feel hurt, insecure or cheated by someone who was choosing 'someone else' for their 'sex object' needs.

The other side of the equation is that society rewards and values men who have high societal presence, monetary worth and knowledge. I think you'd see this same insecurity, this same jealously and "cheating" feeling if a man's girlfriend were receiving valuable gifts, attending "high society" parties or receiving knowledgeable advice from another male. It's a challenge to their value as a person, just as many women perceive pornography to be a challenge towards their value as a woman.

__________________
"I'm typing on a computer of science, which is being sent by science wires to a little science server where you can access it. I'm not typing on a computer of philosophy or religion or whatever other thing you think can be used to understand the universe because they're a poor substitute in the role of understanding the universe which exists independent from ourselves." - Willravel