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levite--i should i suppose have said that i didn't think the questions not interesting or sound--i just don't think they're ethical questions--the problem seems to be a violation of a sense of propriety--to my mind that's a matter of symmetry--a question of fit, say. i'm not sure about this next bit, but it seems like that could be a fit between class position (though it's hard to say whose) and actions. this symmetry or correspondence is at bottom an aesthetic matter. ethics comes in as a way of talking about violation in this context.
and i don't really know what i'd do were i in your position, abaya. if i was inclined to not like these people for other reasons but couldn't find a reason to act on it, i'd probably use this. but if i wasn't so inclined, i wouldn't have a particular reaction in principle. weddings are strange things.
generally, they're about the display of a sense of class position, often more on the part of parents than on the part of who is getting married.
either way, i figure let them have the party that they want to have.
i find bad music at the reception far more bothersome than the amount of money splashed out on a wedding, but i'm just like that.
i like parties.
and when the revolution comes, the parties will all be better.
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a gramophone its corrugated trumpet silver handle
spinning dog. such faithfulness it hear
it make you sick.
-kamau brathwaite
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