Quote:
Originally Posted by mia_ad
And what are you doing with your so called "messed up sex drive" ?
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I didn't call my sex drive messed up, from my perspective it is messed up NOT to have a sex drive. Nature gives us a drive, that we will propagate productivity of life, it's healthy to have such a drive.
Where that drive takes one, can be another matter. A good example of a sex drive gone bad is one who gets aroused by inanimate objects...such as doors (I use this example because I knew someone like this once, and because I don't care to use some of the nastier ones). It's healthy for a human to want to have sex with another human or many...but not when it involves chopping each other to pieces.
When I said it is messing with my drive, what I mean is that I am getting even more aroused then I am normally, and that it requires even more self-control to keep myself from being reduced to an animal state. This builds up pressures in the brain, most notably in the central ventricle. At times I can feel my pineal and pituitary glands swelling and secreting fluids, and this leads to naturally altered states of mind, which in turn affects the drive...driving me out of it...making it harder to keep stability. Who needs viagra?
How have I been handling this drive? LOL...it is far from easy, my wife is in the end phase of being pregnant so I can't get as rough as I prefer. Plus, I need at least a good hour or two, if not much more, in order to bring brain pressures down to a more relaxing and peaceful state. I would do better to channel the energy into regeneration cycles to increase my health, and I know how...if I don't do this then much of the energy flushes through my mind causing me to have billions of thoughts, which leaves my mind feeling exhausted at times, as many of these thoughts are going different directions...
If the pressures reach a certain point where I simply begin to feel on the brink of exploding...what do you think I do?
I can either get more and more
until I go
and
...
Or simply...
I am now 27 days deep, when I reached the 23rd day I was beginning to wonder, now I am feeling...things go on in my brain...there wasn't much time warping after the 23rd day this time, and this left me a little confused, however today seemed much longer then normal, enough to the point where I noticed a difference.
What I am going to start working on is my Tantra, and I have already developed tracks to keep track of my progress. This should help stabilize many different things all at once, and will allow me to channel that extra energy into something that is either productive or soothing, so or so its becoming more and more obvious to me that if I don't do anything this is going to get increasingly difficult until it becomes too difficult. The point of this experiment is to find out what happens...so I will be striving to find ways to make it possible to continue even further...speaking of which, I had better wind down and begin my exercises and meditation.