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Old 07-25-2008, 04:11 AM   #13 (permalink)
The_Jazz
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There's a member of this site that hasn't logged on in probably a year or more who would have been great to hear from on this. Sadly, she's one of those that just sort of faded away with real life issues.

However, I went and looked at a couple of her threads since I had a conversation about her with someone else yesterday, and I think she'd say something along the lines of "follow your joy". That is, go find what makes YOU happy. You are not a proxy of your parents. It is your life, not theirs. If they do not like the way that you are living your life and they can't find it within themselves to love you despite that, then they have huge problems. But if you can find what makes you happy, well, your problems will seem miniscule in comparison.

You said you weren't exagerating, so I assume that you're using the word "hate" very purposefully. If that is indeed the case, then perhaps you might find it time to go to your parents individually and say, "despite what you may think of me, I do love you, but the way you treat me makes me question whether or not you do actually love me. So I'm calling a time-out on our relationship for the next few months. Let's use that time to examine how we really feel about each other." This sounds mostly like a "them" problem and not a "you" problem, and even temporarily cutting ties on a parental relationship is going to be tough. But if you do decide it's best for you, then you should seriously consider doing it.

And do make sure that you take the time to figure out what makes you happy.
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