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I think the best part about you posting in TFP, Ms.Milkyway, is that everybody here gives great options. I agree with all the posts thus far.
Of course, this is a big problem. I don't know your husband, but the first thing I can say is not to be confrontational about it (if you haven't already). Perhaps try some new forms of sex, or again, like you said, be the initiator. I think the thing women do least is initiating. They want sex, but don't physically show it. I like your idea, but that might be a problem. I know one solution for you would be to maybe take a drive with him to "get away from the kids". Then, find a good parking spot, and begin touching his body in the car. Perhaps escalate it and see where it goes from here.
Again, as men get older, they do lose sex drive. I know when I hit my midlife crisis, sex was definately NOT on my mind. I thought, there are better things to do in life than hump my wife. You almost have to sell it to him, and perhaps, pretend he is a horny teenage boy again. Maybe flash him, wear more cleavage, slip him some aphrodisiacs, or maybe even sleep nude.
Being married, I know I hardly have any sex, and I also know that my wife is always begging for it. I think that perhaps he would like you to take interest in his life, or his work, or something that he does (maybe a hobby?) because he obviously doesn't think that sex is the most important thing right now. Maybe ask him that tonight in bed. For me, it was just that I didn't spend enough time with my wife and couldn't find anything to do with her. Maybe instead of sex, go on dates again. I do know that if you don't continue connecting with him like you did in the college-days that he will continually lose sex drive. Whether or not you have to use "stim pack" strategies to increase his sex drive temporarily or not is up to you, but I think it is time to look deeper into your problem and not deeper into your vagina.
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